Sunday, October 29, 2006

Busch Race 10/28/06 - Memphis - Bo Duke vs. John Scneider



Because of the wacky race schedules all day Saturday - the Busch & IROC races overlapping followed by the truck race, I got all confused, so I missed most of

THE INVOCATION: Dunno who gave it, but he sounded a lot like Bill Clinton only without the charisma.

THE NATIONAL ANTHEM: Oh gosh. What a shame. Ol' Bo Duke was there (as well as The General Lee) and he was doing just a bang-up job singing "The Star Spangled Banner". He has a beautiful, strong voice that could almost be described as an Irish Tenor, and he was singing the song straight as an arrow -Cecil and I were in awe. Fireworks went off right on time for "The rockets red glare", and we were all set to dole out four stars each when John Schneider reared his ugly head. Sigh. Man. What was he thinkin'?? Bo Duke had just sung "Oh say does that star spangled banner yet wave..." so beautifully, he went to draw a breath, and Schneider jumped to say "Yes it does!" all Vegas like - I dunno- he was in Memphis, maybe he thought Elvis would do that. Elvis mighta, but Elvis was fuckin' high 24-7. Oh well, better luck next time.

THREE STARS and a smack upside the head from Willard's Garage.

THE FLYOVER: Didn't get any credit, but it looked kinda like 2 helicopters way off in the distance.

THE COMMAND: Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, shouted "Gentlemen!! Start your engines!!! Wooooooh!!!" in a high pitched, reedy voice, but she put as much spunk (not that kind, stupid!) as she could muster on it. Cecil was disappointed as the situation had so much potential. He was hoping for her head to turn into a sort of Ed "Bid Daddy" Roth/Tim Burton sort of affair where her eyes would bug out right before her head exploded, but that just wasn't meant to be. He said, "For a 70 year old chick with her tits strapped up, a 20 pound wig and a very invasive girdle, she was doin' good to draw a breath at all.

FOUR STARS from Cecil, who added TWO from Vampirilla.
THREE STARS from Dixie.

I missed all the pre-race festivities for the IROC race - hopefully the folks over at Caws'n'Jaws got a recap. Watched racin' all day, then went to bed for a few hours & got up to tak Cecil to an intimate costume party at Kitty & Beakers. Henry the VIII was there - he talks just like Michael Caine. Weird. Napolean was there, with his own soundtrack - very nice touch. I sat next to Julius Ceasar the whole time. He's a lively conversationalist, and until last night I wasn't aware he was Jewish. Who knew?

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