The Sylvania 300, Loudon, N.H.

A-10 Warthogs

Hm. Harvick wins yet again. Yawn. As predicted, the race at Loudon was kind of a snoozer. At least nobody got hurt. Or worse. For that we are thankful.

During the "Poached Raisch" (thank you, Ben Hamlin) interviews, Jeff Gordon showed a lot of class by running up to Tony Stewart and giving him an "Atta boy" for finishing second, and to express his appreciation for how well Tony raced him. Both were grinning like Pat Ass monkeys, and you could feel the love. Now that's something you don't see every day.

And just by the way - how about that Dave Blaney? Led a couple of laps. Hung in the top ten a great deal of the time. Cut a tire about mid-race, had to make a green flag pit-stop, and fought his way back to come in ninth. The mighty Tommy Baldwin is back with the Cat 22.... ah well, if it can't be Ward, I'd just as soon it was Blaney. I like the cut of his giblets.

THE INVOCATION: Was given by some priest from some Diocese up around there, and I'm afraid I didn't catch his name. Cecil suggested it might by "Soloman Wordy", because he was kind of solemn and wordy. We did love the way he said, "Our Lord" with that crazy New England accent. "Ow-ah Lod." Howza chowdah, Teddy?

OUR NATIONAL ANTHEM: performed by Denise DeSap, who probably sings in the choir at Father Soloman's Cathedral.

Cecil gives her THREE STARS "for her solid, workmanlinke rendition and fine Yankee Craftsmanship."

I give her TWO AND A HALF STARS because I don't care for the "church lady" style of singing. If you were to judge her performance the way the average (white) choir director would, it was flawless. There's just something about churchy sopranos that bugs me.


THE FLYOVER: Four A-10 Warthogs from the New Hampshire Air National Guard. Very cool. And guess what? They were about the only people involved that got a banner at the bottom of the screen identifying them. Okay TNT, we'll take it. If you can only give credit once, let it be for the military. I still think you suck, though.

THE COMMAND: given by Frank Zantiago. Cecil gives THREE STARS to the guy who announced him. No stars for Zantiago, though. He leaned into it like he mighta had something, but betrayed us by being a wussy. That's all I have to say, other than I'm getting so goddam tired of these pantywaist/waste corporate corpses that I don't even want to acknowledge them anymore. Release the bats, y'all.